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| The Power of Love - Part II |
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Last week I wrote about the powerful benefits of love to health when love is defined as a simple quality of caring about oneself and others. I emphasized the great value of being true to one’s authentic inner self, not in a selfish way, but in an uplifting way. I also emphasized the importance of seeing and treating others as authentic beings. This kind of caring is one of the great secrets of vibrant health.
Does love really have such a powerful effect on health? Cynics doubt this, and many others question the effectiveness of such love in the real world. Since this is a common question, it’s worth examining. When looked at carefully, doubts or questions about the effectiveness of love come down to thinking that it's too idealistic or too soft to be practical in the real, hard-knock world.
There is an element of plausibility in these criticisms of love, because some idealistic people fail to take hard realities into account, and others seem to be too pampering or yielding to be very effective in the real world. Yet both these criticisms fail to appreciate the full definition of love, and therefore fail to recognize its true power.
Truly caring about oneself means to care about one's inner integrity. This requires real strength. To care for oneself with honesty takes self-discipline and the ability to make hard decisions that involve saying "Yes" to inner growth and "No" to that which hinders inner growth. To care for oneself often means the opposite of pampering oneself.
Caring about others involves recognizing and honoring them as authentic beings. It means making every effort to understand them and to facilitate their inner growth. Does this mean that one should always yield to others? No. Loving others does not mean giving away your integrity. It does not mean always agreeing with others. It does mean honoring their authenticity, even in disagreement.
It is not always easy to find the loving solution to every problem. Yet, in any conflicting situation at any level (personal, familial, local, national, or international,) working on a caring solution for all concerned is healthier and more productive than trying to force a power solution. Unfortunately, in the midst of conflict, the power of love is usually not recognized. As a result, it is overlooked in situations where it is most needed. It is because love is given such short shrift that skeptics doubt its power.
In concluding this essay, it is worth emphasizing that the power of love is much more magnificent than simply being a way of avoiding or resolving conflict. More than all else, love is what brings joy and meaning into life. It is what creates overflowing blessings in life. It is why St. Paul wrote, even in the midst of hardship, "Now abides faith, hope, and love - and the greatest of these is love."
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